No, I don’t care about your real name. I want to know the pseudonym you’ve used exclusively since the day you started gaming for your RPG elfkins, your Gamertag, your World of Warcraft gobloids, your forum blowhard personalities, your virtual petz—for any videogame-related activity that asks you, “Halt! Who games here?”
What do I care? I’m working on a little story about people’s funny play names and their funnier origin stories. So tell me your name and share its sordid history at email@example.com, subject header “Hello, my name is…” And even if you don’t care about your game identity—even if you let in-game name generators do the work for you, you lazy, uncreative sack of lame—tell me why.
Thanks for helping. Please enjoy the creepy blockhead photo at this game school.